S-27 , nbh-extension, VNIT Nagpur !

Wonderful soothing music filled my heart in Avaya's cafeteria.. it was I with I.. yeah.. in solitude..

Right.. it is a saturday, but yet i came down to office to convert my loneliness at home to some solitude in my cubicle..

That soothing music took me to a new beautiful world.. hey! no.. not new.. i realised that it was the old beautiful world.. my friends at vnit..

I was about to have maggi for lunch, for who is going to walk to the magarpatta hotels in the afternoon.. yes i feared loneliness again..

The 4-5 hindi songs i heard being played in the cafeteria after i came, sounded great but none of them had i listened to earlier..

There was this beautiful change in the tempo of the music and then the sudden weaning and revamping which stole that moment from me.

" .. garfield, did u notice that beauty?" - i was ecstatic ;
Alas! garfield (ashutosh) is not here.
"I am not in my hostel room dumbo!" - I told myself.

This is a reason i have STOPPED listening to about 60-70% of my song collection. Garfield has listened to every of my favourite songs(be it tamil, hindi, english or marathi) and we used to discuss at length the various techniques involved.

Besides my music collection puts me into the an imaginary world of my staying in hostel, which then i find painful to come out of.

A week back, when ashutosh recalled his experience to me over the phone, about his going to the hostel after passing out, sent out a chill in my spine!
He could not stop his tears when he noticed that "baba(i.e. I ) no more stays in S-27 in Nbh-Extn"
I got the fright of my life when i heard that from him.
I realised i was convinced wrongly that i am only on a holiday trip away from hostel.
Meanwhile, I was reminded of Allen, who left the last from hostel(thanks to IAF interviews) described the hostel as a graveyard !!

Garfield further had told me, " baba.. when u enter the yeshwantnagar gate man.. what a beautiful feeling.. breathtaking memories attacked me yaar.. our mess-offs of all, the photo-sessions..".

I could not control my tears! I could not accept this.
All my dosts' absence attacked me!!(writing all their names would only torture me mentally further! )

"Lets go once man baba.. ".- he further told.
I lost my voice to tears and gained back to say him, "OK".

Do i have the guts to enter the college, for such a weak heart like i can't even stand a minute's loss of my dosts??- i wondered.

After a while doma(srini) called up to say he is going to college for some work and hence asked me to make it to nagpur to meet him.

I was excited !! Doma was a person I had great affection and bonding for, within just a few days in the 2nd year when we got together in block-7 hostel.
Then i recalled garfield's conversation which scared me of the scene at my hostel.

"can i take the fact that my 2nd floor nbh-extn is being occupied by some juniors and that my friends are no more there!!"
"nooo way"- came the answer!
I convinced doma citing some dumb reason that i cant make it!

"maggi- sir" -shrilled the cook.
"uh.. aan..."
whoooph!! where was i?
Soon i understood the reality that i am at avaya's cafeteria..
As before the soothing songs started to flow through my ears.
"..these are the culprits that take me to the imaginary world.."- i told myself.

Everything, i felt , went frozen for a moment!

"maya.. illusion.." - i told myself.

I picked up the maggi and started gulping through quickly so that i get out of the cafeteria (which is subjecting me to loneliness yet again).

I suddenly was reminded of the wonderful mumbai-trip i had the previous weekend. Sam and gudi had come to sahare's place so that we could have an entire night and day together.
An Hostel Experience! :)
I was also reminded of the pain of separation during the journey back to pune, after just one day of revisiting hostel life!

"..this weak heart can't take anymore.." - i told myself and walked out of the cafeteria with a masala-chai(unusually, as i always stay addicted to filter-coffee).

As i walked down to my cubicle to do some kind of time-pass, a vision struck me and questioned "give up the temporary.. it will only cause u pain!! "

"true Father!!"- i talked with Peace flowing into my heart, " .. i yet again realised that YOU are the only Permanent Companion and Friend of mine!!"

As i started to write this post after reaching the cubicle, i wished that Lord SAI never puts me into another eddy of loneliness!!

One thing for sure is i was yet again fed with the lost wisdom that GOD alone is one's true and constant companion, and that one can never have any worldly possession with him for more than a certian period!!

AMEN!